Wednesday, February 9, 2011

One Rock At A Time

So, here I sit. So incredibly grateful for the rocking chair. The white one that was sitting in our garage for several years after we moved Mayce and Bryce to older rooms, and thought we had no need for it. The one that was so simple and so I thought....until Blake hit "the phase." And when I type, phase, I mean "angry, frustrated, clingy, disobedient, sad" phase. We had only been in the new house 6 months, our 4th precious baby was here, and taking some new attention, and life as he knew it was upside down. Not to mention the fact that I was now homeschooling two, and needing some specific time in the day to do so. He was sad, he was almost 2 and he was NOT having it. We found that bedtime began to be hard on him, and he quickly shifted from laying down quietly, to crying for several minutes. These were Blake's for mine.

I was now a mother of 4, six and under. I was recovering from delivery, settling into/keeping a home triple the size of our other, homeschooling a 5 and 6 year old, shifting with my hubby as he transitioned in his job, all the while, realizing that days at home were now the norm, and going out was now quite difficult. I found solace and comfort in the sweet, short, time I had with my Father before my kids woke up, and I put all I had into making each day enjoyable, purposeful and disciplined. Then...Blake hit his phase, and I hit a new phase of tired! Brayden was 4 months old, and we could just not pinpoint why this was so difficult for him. After much prayer, I walked out to the garage one day, and felt two words pound in my heart..."rocking chair." "God" I said, "he's too old for that!" His response "it's not just for's for you too."

Needless to say, that caught me off guard. But, you better believe I ripped that chair out of the garage that second and cleaned it up! We moved it to his room, and began reading his bible story in the chair, then rocking and singing love songs to him for about 15 minutes. As I would sit there with Blake snuggled on my chest, I was overwhelmed with emotion. It literally seemed that each rock of that chair brought healing. It was like we were both being mended in our heart with every single squeaky motion. As I would sing/worship and whisper every phrase I could think of to tell Blake how much I loved him, my Father would literally do the same thing to me. It produced the most incredibly intimate moments.....every single day, every single rock.

One day, while rocking, I began to thank the Lord for this "simple" solution to such a difficult phase. He began to flood my heart with this incredible concept of healing one step, or rock, at a time. See, it's often the simplicity of His plan that is so impactful for His glory. He could have given David supernatural strength, but instead he gave a stone. He could have given Moses a fleet of angels to whisk the Israelites away, but instead he gave him a staff and an interpreter. He could have given the world a mind-blowing heavenly entrance of the King, but instead he gave us a precious baby in a humble environment. This mommy business is not easy, and I will never claim it to be, but I certainly know that if our focus on His perspective is lost for one second.....if our eyes leave the Master and glance at the storm of our circumstance.....we will begin to sink faster than we can imagine. Just like Peter, we too can get weary, afraid and overwhelmed (understandably) and begin to lose sight of Who is guiding our faith walk. The story is not in our weakness, though, but rather in His beautiful redemption.....which He freely gives without hesitation!

I called out, and He the form of a chair. Never would have imagined this white hunk of wood to bring so much peace and mending to our hearts......but the Rock of Ages knows exactly how powerful one rock with Him will be, and for that, I am eternally grateful!

"The Lord is my Rock, my fortress, my deliverer; my God is my Rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold." (Ps. 18:2)